Speaking Hamsterese

If you have seen the movie "Overboard" (and I know at least one of you have, multiple times!) you might remember there is a kid in there that always speaks in a PeeWee Herman voice.

I’m reminded of that movie because, well, Noah has been speaking in a hamster voice for the last few weeks. It sounds kind of like talking after inhaling helium. In fact, I thought that was when it started, after his birthday party Ashley, Brandy and Joe were sucking up the helium from the balloons. And I thought maybe he was copying them. But, Joe insists, no, it began before that. And he should know because it drives him absolutely crazy. He hates the hamster voice almost as much as he would hate it if Noah suddenly decided he wanted to wear pink ballet shoes and a tutu. Well, maybe not that much, but close. So he tries to get Noah to speak in a "normal" voice, but when he exaggerates it he ends up sounding like Arnold Schwarzenegger.

So now Noah goes around speaking like Alvin the Chipmunk or Arnold. Or some weird combination of the two. Oddly enough, I barely notice it, but I can always tell by looking at Joe because you would think somebody was scratching nails on a chalkboard. And, oddly enough, that makes me laugh [insert PeeWee Herman laugh here].  

Published in: on February 25, 2008 at 9:51 am  Leave a Comment  

Sometimes our conversations make sense, sometimes they don’t

Yesterday morning Noah woke up early. Since Joe and I went to bed late the night before I decided to get up and head little hamster off at the pass before he could come in and wake up Daddy too. I explained to Noah that Daddy was sleeping and we were going to try not to wake him up. So we go about our morning routine and at some point I go use the guest bathroom. Noah immediately notices my ‘absense’ and begins calling :

Noah: Mom?…mom!…Mommy!…MOMMY! (calling in a panicked voice as if I maybe suddenly just decided to go on a six month expedition to antarctica and forgot to tell him).

Me: (in the loudest hushed whisper I can manange) Noah, I’m in here

Noah: (running round the corner by the powder room straight to our bedroom) MOMMY!

Me: (giving up) NOAH! I’m in here!

Noah appears at the door

Me: Why are you yelling?

Noah: I’m fine

Me: I told you I wanted you to be quiet

Noah: I just wanted to improvise that you were okay.

Well, I’m impressed he knows the word improvise, even if he didn’t use it  correctly. And it’s nice that he’s concerned for me. But jeez, can’t I just go potty without the drama?

P.S. Joe just came out and told me that when Noah ran into the bedroom briefly he announced "I’m going to wake up Daddy!" because that’s probably the best thing to do when your mama has just disappeared into thin air. Which happens a lot, you know.

Published in: on February 19, 2008 at 9:56 am  Leave a Comment  

Hamster Birthday to you!

It was a very hamster birthday. Mom and Dad are lame, though. While we did purchase his presents months ago we had no wrapping paper. Also, when Noah first woke up and we told him happy birthday the first thing he wanted to know was where was his cake? I replied "You’ll have to wait and see-eeee!" Translation: Oh crap, I don’t have one! I ordered one for his party with his friends on Saturday but I didn’t think about getting a second one for his actual birthday.

So, we dumped him at grandma’s and ran to the store. We bought the wrapping paper and a hamster cake.
Well, it wasn’t really a hamster, but we got away with it. It was two pupcakes covered in yards of icing to look like a dog, but when he saw it he said "Oh a hamster!" and we took the ball and ran with it.Then he opened his gifts. From Daddy: a Smart Cycle video game. It’s like a little motorcycle/bicycle that you pedal and try to catch letters on the screen (it’s hooked to the tv). At least he’s pedaling while playing  the game, getting some small amount of exercise. And Daddy got him a bowling game. Yes, a bowling alley. It has ball return and electronic score keeper, automatic pin reset and everything. (can you see me rolling my eyes here?) From Grandma, a coin bank that counts your money for you as you put it in. He was a little disappointed to learn that once you put the money in it stays in. And, finally, from Mommy a two sided art easel. It has a chalk board on one side and a dry erase board on the other. It came with magnetic numbers and letters that stick to the dry erase side and you can attach paper to either side as well.

After playing with the gifts for a while we decided to go out to eat, so we headed to Outback. We told the waitress it was his birthday, they planned to sing. She came by our table and asked him his name so they could sing it. Now normally when this happens he gets shy and clams up. I saw in his face he was grappling with the decision of what to say or do under this pressure. Finally, he answered "Baby Hamster"

I could just see all the waiters singing "happy birthday dear Hamster" and having an entire restaurant full of people craning their necks to look at the crazy lady who named her kid Hamster. We fessed up to avoid the embarrasment.

Two things about this day: One, he was a really really good boy all day (well, except I guess for when he first went to grandma’s, but I wasn’t there so it doesn’t count). And two, he kept his pants dry all day… Woohoo! A pretty good birthday, all in all.

Published in: on February 14, 2008 at 8:33 pm  Leave a Comment  

My baby turns three in less than six hours!

Noah doesn’t particularly like praise. It’s odd. I thought kids thrived on that stuff. Not my kid. He gets irritated when you praise him, changes the subject and I would say even goes so far as to avoid it. For a long time we thought he didn’t know his colors. I was even beginning to worry a tiny bit that he might have been color blind, except for the fact that he (supposedly) didn’t know his letters or numbers either. Since I’ve never heard of ABC blindness and  I thought maybe there was a connection I just let it slide since it was too early for action.

One night, Joe was reading to Noah and trying to get him to work on colors. Noah, as usual, was getting every single color wrong except blue. He knows blue. Well, Joe started praising him and telling him he was right even when he was wrong. Noah got very upset that Joe was telling him he was right when he was wrong. So, from that, we deduced that he did *know* what the right answer was. He had to know the right answer in order to know that what he said was wrong. It was an "aha" moment for us. He still doesn’t like us to work on letters, numbers and colors with him, but I’m feeling much more assured that he is picking it up even if he won’t recite them on command*.

So, with him not appreciating being praised, it has put us in a quandry with the potty training thing. I want to be happy and praise him when he does go, but he really doesn’t like it, so I usually play it down a bit with one "good job!" or something.

Well today I talked him into pooping on the potty. It was a big moment because when I saw him heading for the stairs I knew he was going there to do his business in private. We talked about it for several minutes (something I’ve done numerous times in the past) but this time he finally agreed! Woohoo! And he did it! Woohoo! I decided while I was waiting that if he went I was going all out with the praise. I thought maybe if I really really jumped for joy and danced and sung my heart out I could get him going with me. So when he went, I started in: "Oh yeah! Oh yeah! You did it! You did it! Oh yeah!" All while getting the hands and arms going in a circular motion while wiggling my hips back and forth, hair flying to and fro (more fro, since I’m in dire need of a haircut).

Noah: Mom…MOM?

Me: (pausing mid booty shake) yes?

Noah: (sounding all of thirteen, or whatever age they develop that intense dislike of dorky parenting) Could you please stop that now?

Bahahahah! Ah well, that’s ok. He decided to put on his big boy Spiderman underwear after that and kept them dry the rest of the day until bed time. Woohoo!

*This makes me a bit worried for when he begins school. I can just see me calling the teacher and explaining "well, yes, I know he won’t tell you the right answer, but believe me when I say he really does know it. Can’t you grade him on that if I give you my word?"

Happy Birthday tomorrow, Little Man. I mean Hamster.

Published in: on February 11, 2008 at 8:01 pm  Comments (1)  

More on Baby Hamster…

This morning’s conversation as I’m getting ready, brushing teeth, drying hair etc:

Noah: I love you too, mama (He always says the too part)

Me: I love you too, Bug. (Short for Lovebug)

Noah: No! I’m a hamster!

Me: Oh, excuse me. I love you too, Hamster.

Noah: You smell good!

Me: Thank you!

Noah: You smell like rompadomp.

Me: What is that? (thinking whatever rompadomp is, it could be worse, he could have said I smell like dog butt or something. Which in his world would probably be the ultimate compliment. In mine, not so much).

Noah: giggle giggle

[A few minutes pass…]

Noah: I love you too mommy

Me: I love you too, Hamster

Noah: Baby Hamster

Me: I love you too, Baby Hamster

Published in: on February 9, 2008 at 1:53 pm  Leave a Comment  

You can’t shobel with out your glubs

Noah is a pretty good talker for his age, I think. He does have a few cute mispronunciations, which we let slide, and yes, sometimes even encourage. He does know the correct word is cupcakes, but we all still call them pupcakes around these parts. I think he knows the right work is marshmallows, but smarshmallows sound so much better, don’t you agree?

Sadly, I believe the word potaboes has been replaced with the more common noun potatoes. I will miss having potaboes for dinner, it was kind of fun.

This morning at Grandma’s he really wanted to shobel snow. Unfortunately we didn’t bring his glubs. (Or shoes, but that was beside the point). Grandma was telling me that the little tassels that hold her curtains back are called fuzzers. Who knew? And when we show our appreciation we always say "Gank you".

By the way, remember Baby Monkey? Baby Monkey lived with us for quite a while. Eventually, without us realizing it, he stopped coming around. Then recently we’ve had Baby Hamster move in, occupying the space that used to be Baby Monkey’s. Baby Hamster has a cage and a wheel. Oh, and his name is Tricky. Tricky Baby Hamster, as he likes to be called, has many of the same likes and dislikes as Baby Monkey did. What a coincidence. While we were shopping at Costco one day, I came across a super soft fuzzy body pillow that I had to have. That has come to be Tricky’s cage. Whenever Baby Hamster is in our bed, the pillow is off limits to anyone but him. I haven’t allowed it to leave our bed, though, for fear it would mean relinquishing all rights.

So, that’s all for now. I thought I’d have an update for the Pizza thing for you, but things are not settled yet. I’ll just say that it may be going a different direction than we had planned, but things are still moving. I’ll update as soon as anything is set in stone. Soon, I hope. The stress is killing me.   

Published in: on February 6, 2008 at 11:40 pm  Leave a Comment  

Miscellaneous stuff

Pic29 No, this is nobody I know. It’s just some random guy on the internet who got so drunk he passed out. And has rotten friends.

Not much to report here. Noah has been sick all week with a cold. Ugh. Being stuck in the house with a sick toddler makes me feel a lot like that random guy looks.

The other night it was tantrum central here. We were trying to get Noah out of the bath and dressed for bed, but we had to keep putting him in time out every two minutes. He even went buck naked for one of them. I had planned to feed him a TV dinner (just because it was the fastest thing I had on hand) and get him to bed ASAP, but I didn’t like the idea because TV dinners are a fun treat. So, I tried to hide the fact it was a TV dinner by putting the food on a plate and leaving out the dessert. Unfortunately, the little stinker recognized the incognito food right away. When he asked for the pudding that comes with it Joe explained that he had not been behaving himself, what with 3 or 4 time outs with in the previous half hour (I lost count!) and that he did not deserve a dessert. Noah said nothing, happily ate his dinner and got ready for bed.

One of his favorite books is the Very Hungry Caterpillar. Ever since he was tiny he has loved the inside cover which is covered with colored dots. He thinks they look like candy and always has to start the book by picking a candy for everyone he knows. Well, that night when he got to picking Daddy’s treat he decided Daddy didn’t get one, he didn’t deserve it. (snicker snicker, guess that’ll show him, huh?)

Anyway, here are some odds and ends pictures I had hanging out in my camera I decided to upload before I cleaned off the card. There are a few where he was scrubbing his hair on the couch causing it to stand up, but it’s hard to see. A few where he’d been putting a black marker in his mouth (washable, thankfully!), a few where he was playing with a gift he got from Grandma Bobbie and one of him on my computer. Can you believe that kid can click and drag already? Genius I tell ya.

Published in: on February 2, 2008 at 10:51 pm  Leave a Comment